What a beautiful year 2017 has been. It was a year filled with tremendous amount of failure, stress, push backs, intense periods of lows and days when I just couldn’t bring myself to get up again… but I did. 2017 was the year I made drastic changes, I moved to downtown Toronto, started going to school full time while I worked full time at my day job, as well as my side hustle and blog. It was also the year in which I got my first speeding ticket yikes!
2017 was a year when I decided to take magnificent risks in order to get myself to where I wanted to be: a tranquil place of peace and happiness. I abruptly quit my job one day in the summer because I decided it just wasn’t helping me get to the place I wanted to go to. I was jobless for a month reevaluating life, spending countless hours by the candlelight going through existential crises and questioning every step I had taken in the past, however I kept working on my blog and searched for positions that sparked flickers of light in my soul, and before long I found my dream job and I haven’t been happier and more fulfilled.
I decided to reach out to fellow creatives in the city and network despite that fact it brought out all sorts of anxiety inside of me. As a result though, I met so many amazing new people this year and I am so glad to have them as a part of my life. I had decided earlier in the year that I would strive to surround myself with positivity and poetry, which is exactly what I did. I read more books (will be doing a list soon), watched more movies (another list perhaps), hung out with friends and truly expanded my social circle in a healthy way. Instead of looking for affirmations and acceptance from others, I looked for ways to coexist with the differences and see the beauty in it. Instead of forming an echo chamber of sorts, I pushed myself out of my comfort zones and challenged my ideals every opportunity I got.
This past year, I truly explored my creativity and its limits. I had been struggling with the way I had been expressing myself on the blog, as well as my art. I was always caught between what I really wanted to express and what I thought would be successful. Thus, I was always in a constant state of conflict, resulting in mediocre output and minimal satisfaction as a result. Therefore, I decided to use this time to just freely explore all aspects available and find new ways to express myself that would result in both inner satisfaction and external success.
I think I have found a way… but one never knows until she tries right? So, 2018 is going be the year in which I shall try all these concepts and directions I have conjured up over the past few months and seeing where it takes me. I also decided during this past year to change my Instagram and Blog’s name from Fatima Zehra to A Painted Soul. I had been wanting to change the identity but wasn’t too confident about it until I decided to just take the plunge and do it since it was what I truly felt on doing at the time. I decided to change the direction of my feed as well as my content, which is why my blog has been a little quiet over the past few months. However, now that I have planned a clear direction and know exactly where I need to take my blog, I am excited for the year ahead.
I will be starting a sub-blog and Instagram of sorts under the name of, Soul of Orion – there is a cute story behind the name which I will be sharing once the blog/channel goes live. I decided to do this as it will be a channel in which I will be sharing snip bits, albeit raw, of the visual poet within me. A place where my only concern would be to be true to myself instead of worrying about the logistics of making it an “external success.” A place of freedom, poetry, art, and the hidden me. Eeeck! I am super excited for this project!
Other than that, I am hoping to launch my Youtube channel sometime this year, but there is a lot of planning involved so I can’t truly say when exactly that is going to happen.
I want 2018 to be a year of incredible creative hustle minus the fear and doubts of failure. A year full of art, poetry, growth, the true self and love ☾
Happy New Year, darlings!